In a world filled with external opinions and societal expectations, finding your true self can be a transformative journey. There are four major steps to take in order to shift from seeking validation from others to embracing your own authority and defining your narrative.

#1: Accept That You Are The Authority of Your Life

The first step is recognizing that you are the ultimate authority of your life. This foundational step towards self-validation entails acknowledging that your beliefs, values, and choices hold the utmost significance.

While external influences may shape our perceptions, it’s crucial to prioritize our own inner truth above societal expectations or the opinions of others. This acceptance empowers us to take ownership of our lives and chart our own course with confidence and clarity.

Remember, your thoughts matter most.

“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.” – Steve Maraboli

The Conflict Within

Often, conflicting thoughts arise—those that align with your self-belief and those that challenge it. Ask yourself: Is it worth holding onto thoughts that undermine your confidence? Recognize that you have the power to filter out negativity and prioritize self-affirmation.

#2: Dismantling External Opinions That You’ve Accepted as Truth

The journey towards self-validation requires us to challenge and question the opinions and beliefs that we have absorbed from external sources. These voices may have subtly shaped our self-perception and beliefs about what is possible for us.

Consider where external opinions come from. For instance:

  • Parents: Their words may stem from their own insecurities, experiences or upbringings.
  • Society: Societal norms can shape our self-perception.
  • Friends: Their views might not align with your unique vision.

By examining these influences with a critical eye and discerning their origins, we can begin to separate external expectations from our authentic selves. This process of dismantling external influence is liberating, allowing us to reclaim our autonomy and embrace our uniqueness.

My Mother’s Voice

To truly free ourselves from the grip of external influence, we must delve into the origins of these voices and their impact on our self-image. Whether rooted in childhood experiences, or cultural norms, these influences may have ingrained beliefs and patterns of thinking that no longer serve us.

By understanding the context and motivations behind these external voices, we can begin to unravel their hold on our psyche and cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness. This journey of self-discovery enables us to forge a more authentic and empowered relationship with ourselves.

For example, I once heard my mother say, “You look just like me,” but she’d also express dissatisfaction with her own appearance. Her self-hate influenced my perception. However, as I grew older, I realized her struggles were rooted in societal biases. I eventually dismantled those ideas and embraced my own beauty.

#3: Challenging External Voices With Empowering Self Talk

Central to the journey of self-validation is the practice of speaking kindly and supportively to ourselves. Too often, our inner dialogue is marked by self-doubt, criticism, and negativity, perpetuating a cycle of insecurity and low self-esteem.

By embracing affirmations and positive self-talk, we can rewire our internal dialogue and cultivate a mindset of self-compassion and self-empowerment. This practice encourages us to acknowledge our worth, celebrate our strengths, and affirm our inherent value as unique individuals.

Reflect on whose opinions you’ve accepted as true. Are they hindering your growth? Challenge them. Remember, you’re not here to fulfill others’ dreams; you’re here to live your own.

#4: Walking Your Talk – Aligning Actions with Aspirations

Lastly, it’s not enough to think or talk about your dreams—you must walk in alignment with them. Ultimately, this journey is not just about introspection and inner work but also about taking tangible steps towards aligning our actions with our beliefs and aspirations. It’s about embodying the values and qualities that we hold dear and living authentically in accordance with our true selves.

This means setting boundaries, pursuing our passions, and honoring our intuition, even in the face of external pressures or expectations. By walking the talk and living in alignment with our inner truth, we can experience a profound sense of fulfillment and purpose.

Even Nay-Sayers Admire You

Surprisingly, those who speak negatively about you secretly admire your determination. They watch your footsteps, curious about your unwavering belief. Realize that you have the authority to speak into yourself. Don’t let external voices control your life.

Embrace your authority, discard harmful narratives, and stand confidently in your truth. It’s time to shift from “what they think” to “who I am.”

Exploring the Transformative Power of Self-Validation

By accepting yourself as the ultimate authority in your own life, dismantling external influences, speaking kindly to yourself, and aligning your actions with your beliefs, you can unlock your true potential and live a life of purpose and meaning. Remember, your journey towards self-validation is unique and ongoing, but with each step, you move closer to embodying your most authentic self.

Ready to explore further? Check out our latest webinar, “Letting GO to Elevate,” where we delve deeper into the transformative power of self-validation and empowerment.

Click here for instant access to this webinar and take the next step towards living a life of authenticity, purpose, and fulfillment: